Originally published in Aging With Attitude Column, My Generation Magazine, The American Journal, Westbrook, Maine May 2012
Coming to Terms with The “L” Word
Remember Maynard G. Krebs from the Dobie Gillis Show? Whenever anyone mentioned work, he would shriek, “work” in a high-pitched voice followed by a face of terror. When someone mentions “leisure”, inside, I have the same reaction as Maynard did for “work”. With the puritan ethic of work instilled deep in my bones, leisure is filed somewhere around “work of the devil”. God may have rested on the seventh day, but take a look at all the things He checked off His to-do list!
As a young nurse, I worked long shifts; breaks were non-existent and lunch usually a rare treat. I think instructors do something to student nurses, hard wiring us to put everyone else’s needs above our own. Often at the end of my day, if I were paying close attention, I would remember that I had not been to the bathroom since I left home to come to work. This is physiologically not good for anyone. I rarely drank water during the day so I was probably in a state of perpetual dehydration. I always heard about a condition called “nurse’s bladder”. I am not sure exactly what it is but I think I have it. Those pesky symptoms that I keep blaming on “I’m just getting old” are probably my profession’s namesake. I do find that I can effectively treat them with persistent Kegel exercises.
It seems that every time I left a job, I would always have vacation time coming to me. I might go on trips but they were usually to conferences that were work related. I had a good time at the conferences because they usually planned bathroom breaks between sessions and there is always water available. I think conferences are the only reason that I have not had to have a bladder transplant…yet.
If you have ever read my articles, you might remember that I often write about things I know either very little or nothing about. Leisure is something that is growing on me. Oddly, as I am getting older, leisure has become very important to me. It used to be important because I noticed on days that I provided myself with ample water and toilet breaks along with some well placed resting times and Kegeling at traffic signals, my joints did not hurt so much. After radically changing my diet from Adkins to one of no animal products, my joints feel better than they have in years. This has helped me enjoy other leisure activities such as Zumba. You can take water and toilet breaks any time you want in my Zumba class, but I am afraid I will miss some of the fun. Old habits die hard.
I am finding I actually like going on vacations. My most recent vacation was to Iceland. It was more affordable than going to the Netherlands, though there were parts of the landscape that did make me think of a netherworld. I loved riding on the tour buses and having someone spoon-feed me the unpronounceable names of the geological beauties stretching before my eyes. Horseback riding was more fun to talk about having done rather than the actual experience. Some, I guess, would consider horseback riding leisure, but it seems like work to me.
Icelanders have created a hearty, creative, and fun-loving community. They use their public access channel often to share their talents with their fellow islanders. When I returned home I actually did a travelogue on Iceland with my local public access channel. The station manager, Georgia Humphrey, was very supportive and said she hoped more people would approach her to do travelogues. It is called public access for a reason. My Iceland travelogue is less than a half hour long and can be seen at www.gorham-me.org. Click on the camera icon and at the bottom of the page is Community Media and listed under that you will find “Hot Stuff in Iceland.”
While I try to stay away from sentiments like, “I’ll rest when I die,” I find there is so much to do that I try to pack in as much in a day as I can. I read a book called “One Year To Live” by Stephen Levine. It was just the nudge I needed to take a look at my own bucket list and do everything I possibly could in a year. I am happy to say that I have chalked off numerous items on that particular to-do list. Probably most of you are familiar with the term bucket list popularized by the movie of the same name. I taught a death and dying class of mostly early twenty year olds who had never heard the phrase. They actually seemed to get interested in my talk when I explained that everyone has a bucket list, which is simply what you want to do before you kick the bucket. They were motivated to participate when I asked them what they wanted to do before they die.
The interesting thing about bucket lists is once we scratch one to-do off; we tend to add new to-dos. That is the way it is supposed to be. That is how bucket lists were designed to work. It is hard wired into our UPC codes. They work best if you keep it flowing…kind of like bladders, filling them up and draining them out, in a timely fashion. It is all about the flow. I have a theory that if we have been using the bucket appropriately then when it comes time to kick it, it will be empty. Therefore, it will make the work of kicking it, easier.
I had a young hospice patient once who told me that he felt like he had lived a full life even though he was still in his twenties. He was dying of a reoccurrence of a cancer he had in his teens. He said that his first cancer was a wake up call that life is to be lived and not put off. He told me he knew that he probably would not live to be very old though he said he did not think he would die this young. He said he did everything on his list of things he wanted to do in his life and he was at peace with that. Then he got a little twinkle in his eyes, smiled and said, “Of course, if I weren’t dying, I would certainly add other things to my list!” As with all my patients who are dying, I learn a lot about living.
Lenora Trussell
Copyright April 2012
Lenora Trussell, RN, author of Circling the Drain, a collection of end-of-life stories and Pain Smarts, a creative strategy for symptom management, is available for workshops, presentations, and consultations on this and other topics. Her web address is www.lenoratrussell.com.
Coming to Terms with The “L” Word
Remember Maynard G. Krebs from the Dobie Gillis Show? Whenever anyone mentioned work, he would shriek, “work” in a high-pitched voice followed by a face of terror. When someone mentions “leisure”, inside, I have the same reaction as Maynard did for “work”. With the puritan ethic of work instilled deep in my bones, leisure is filed somewhere around “work of the devil”. God may have rested on the seventh day, but take a look at all the things He checked off His to-do list!
As a young nurse, I worked long shifts; breaks were non-existent and lunch usually a rare treat. I think instructors do something to student nurses, hard wiring us to put everyone else’s needs above our own. Often at the end of my day, if I were paying close attention, I would remember that I had not been to the bathroom since I left home to come to work. This is physiologically not good for anyone. I rarely drank water during the day so I was probably in a state of perpetual dehydration. I always heard about a condition called “nurse’s bladder”. I am not sure exactly what it is but I think I have it. Those pesky symptoms that I keep blaming on “I’m just getting old” are probably my profession’s namesake. I do find that I can effectively treat them with persistent Kegel exercises.
It seems that every time I left a job, I would always have vacation time coming to me. I might go on trips but they were usually to conferences that were work related. I had a good time at the conferences because they usually planned bathroom breaks between sessions and there is always water available. I think conferences are the only reason that I have not had to have a bladder transplant…yet.
If you have ever read my articles, you might remember that I often write about things I know either very little or nothing about. Leisure is something that is growing on me. Oddly, as I am getting older, leisure has become very important to me. It used to be important because I noticed on days that I provided myself with ample water and toilet breaks along with some well placed resting times and Kegeling at traffic signals, my joints did not hurt so much. After radically changing my diet from Adkins to one of no animal products, my joints feel better than they have in years. This has helped me enjoy other leisure activities such as Zumba. You can take water and toilet breaks any time you want in my Zumba class, but I am afraid I will miss some of the fun. Old habits die hard.
I am finding I actually like going on vacations. My most recent vacation was to Iceland. It was more affordable than going to the Netherlands, though there were parts of the landscape that did make me think of a netherworld. I loved riding on the tour buses and having someone spoon-feed me the unpronounceable names of the geological beauties stretching before my eyes. Horseback riding was more fun to talk about having done rather than the actual experience. Some, I guess, would consider horseback riding leisure, but it seems like work to me.
Icelanders have created a hearty, creative, and fun-loving community. They use their public access channel often to share their talents with their fellow islanders. When I returned home I actually did a travelogue on Iceland with my local public access channel. The station manager, Georgia Humphrey, was very supportive and said she hoped more people would approach her to do travelogues. It is called public access for a reason. My Iceland travelogue is less than a half hour long and can be seen at www.gorham-me.org. Click on the camera icon and at the bottom of the page is Community Media and listed under that you will find “Hot Stuff in Iceland.”
While I try to stay away from sentiments like, “I’ll rest when I die,” I find there is so much to do that I try to pack in as much in a day as I can. I read a book called “One Year To Live” by Stephen Levine. It was just the nudge I needed to take a look at my own bucket list and do everything I possibly could in a year. I am happy to say that I have chalked off numerous items on that particular to-do list. Probably most of you are familiar with the term bucket list popularized by the movie of the same name. I taught a death and dying class of mostly early twenty year olds who had never heard the phrase. They actually seemed to get interested in my talk when I explained that everyone has a bucket list, which is simply what you want to do before you kick the bucket. They were motivated to participate when I asked them what they wanted to do before they die.
The interesting thing about bucket lists is once we scratch one to-do off; we tend to add new to-dos. That is the way it is supposed to be. That is how bucket lists were designed to work. It is hard wired into our UPC codes. They work best if you keep it flowing…kind of like bladders, filling them up and draining them out, in a timely fashion. It is all about the flow. I have a theory that if we have been using the bucket appropriately then when it comes time to kick it, it will be empty. Therefore, it will make the work of kicking it, easier.
I had a young hospice patient once who told me that he felt like he had lived a full life even though he was still in his twenties. He was dying of a reoccurrence of a cancer he had in his teens. He said that his first cancer was a wake up call that life is to be lived and not put off. He told me he knew that he probably would not live to be very old though he said he did not think he would die this young. He said he did everything on his list of things he wanted to do in his life and he was at peace with that. Then he got a little twinkle in his eyes, smiled and said, “Of course, if I weren’t dying, I would certainly add other things to my list!” As with all my patients who are dying, I learn a lot about living.
Lenora Trussell
Copyright April 2012
Lenora Trussell, RN, author of Circling the Drain, a collection of end-of-life stories and Pain Smarts, a creative strategy for symptom management, is available for workshops, presentations, and consultations on this and other topics. Her web address is www.lenoratrussell.com.